We just finished our January Celebration of Woman workshop where 20 beautiful and brave women came together in a special bond of sisterhood. Just look at those glowing goddesses in the picture we took on Sunday!
As I drove home from the workshop I wondered what had made this group so intimate with each other, and realized it was their authenticity and honesty. From the first night, they just dove head on into the processes, and exposed themselves in such a raw and authentic way that a deep bond formed almost immediately.
Intimacy means: INTO ME YOU SEE. And what is it that we as human being really need to have seen? Our shadow, our weaknesses, the parts that we are not proud of. The parts that we think, if anyone knew those, they would be appalled, not love us anymore, and even possible leave us.
So we usually hide those parts, pretend they are not there and develop strategies to compensate for them. In our work, we call that the Defended (Or Survival) Self. We form a mask to protect us from being seen.
Yet true love develops in honesty and authenticity. Truth and love are intimately connected. The truth shall set us free – To Love!
When we are brave enough to let someone see what is not so pretty; our fear, anger, greed, resentment, neediness, addictive tendencies, or our helplessness, it is so freeing.
I personally had had an experience of that last night when I exposed a painful pattern of anger and frustration to two of my close girlfriends on our weekly check in call, and then continued to do so with Lee.
Both times there was such a freedom, such an intimacy, and such a space of love created. I felt so much closer to them, and my anger and frustration actually greatly diminished as it was met in love by these three wonderful friends of mine.
I saw again how all of our shadows just want to be accepted and brought into the light of love.
So for this week, I encourage you to expose something about yourself to a safe person in your life. If there is something you are hiding, that you don’t want anyone to see, discern who in your life is present and safe enough to share this with.
Remember last week we spoke about community and connection as the first gateway to Love? We need other people to help us on our journey. Then take the leap of honest, self-responsible exposure. My guess is it will bring you closer to more loving intimacy with this friend.
I would love to hear how this goes for you – please leave a comment below so we can support you in this gateway to love.
In love and truth,