This week’s newsletter is written by Rajyo Allen (formerly Markman). Rajyo, together with Britta, was the co-founder of Celebration of Being, out of which COR developed. This body of work was birthed out of this one courageous woman’s let go over 25 years ago, and we are happy to present her powerful perspective on this month’s theme:
As the leaves on the trees turn from green to gold to brown, they eventually fall to the ground and become compost for the new growth in the spring. It is a time I am reminded of the cycles of life, and how death and letting go are such an inherent part of existence. It seems that us humans have a hard time accepting death. Yet the times we are living in—with the recent hurricanes and wildfires in this country ripping through many people’s lives—remind us all that even what we cherish and try to hold onto will be taken from us sooner or later.
We go through many deaths in our life and we get to practice letting go while we are alive even in the midst of so much that we love and care about deeply. This is not something I thought about when I was younger. I felt I would stay young, beautiful, fit and healthy forever. I took it for granted. I guess dealing with cancer for five years stripped me of that illusion. I was humbled; it seems that life does that to us.
It reminds us that in the end we will all be returning to the Earth—that no one escapes death. It teaches us that the greatest gift comes from accepting death not as an enemy to fear and fight, but as a friend and great teacher that brings us into a humble relationship with the preciousness of this human life. Death reminds us to cherish every moment here with each of our loved ones since we cannot take anything for granted. All is a gift we have been given to enjoy as long as we have breath.
Those of us who are older and beginning to lose loved ones are increasingly aware of the impermanence of life and the imminence of death. I have been through the experience of letting go of so much in recent years—of the work that I loved and was passionate about for many years, of my land and my community in Lake County when the wildfires devastated the area, and most painful of all the death of my beloved father, friend, mentor and spiritual companion eighteen months ago. Most recently, my husband and I bought a home with the intention to turn it into a healing sanctuary and retreat center, but that is no longer possible. Another opportunity to let go.
Yet on the other side of letting go, there is always a blessing, a gift that Grace gives us as we open to the Mystery. I had this experience when I first birthed the Celebration of Woman workshops in the UK many years ago. As I let go of my dream of living in Australia my life felt like it was falling apart. Out of that let go came the work that has now become COR.
The same is true for me now that I am birthing my new body of work for women in the midlife Rite of Passage. Through my own deep experience of death and letting go came a hidden blessing of being able to offer this service to women who are struggling with the changes that midlife brings. One woman on my recent tele-series “The Midlife Metamorphosis” had a breakthrough right on the first call. She was able to reclaim many parts of herself and her life that she had previously disowned and tried to reject because they were too painful. This gave her a new sense of freedom, responsibility and ownership of her own unique journey. She says she is now feeling the potential of this time in her life and celebrating her Queenship.
In the midlife passage we prepare to release the person we have known ourselves to be up to this point and step into a whole new experience of ourselves, our body and our life. It is like the caterpillar crawling along, thinking it is pretty cool. Then it begins to disintegrate and become goop as a chrysalis, thinking the world is coming to an end. Yet ultimately it emerges as a butterfly, and gets to share its beauty and Grace with the entire world.
In my Mid-Life Metamorphosis online series I delve deeply into the stages of the death and release of ego identification as we move more deeply into Soul integration, which I call the Alchemy of Awakening. Feel free to visit my website or email me at Rajyo@rajyo.com for more information.
We’d love to hear from you about what you are being asked to let go of at this part of your journey. What might be the blessings waiting for you? Please share it on our Facebook page here.
Rajyo and the COR Team