We are in relationship all of the time. With all sorts of things. It is not merely people we are in relationship with. It is places, things, animals, plants, hobbies, actions, etc. 

Creativity is one of those ‘things’ that we are in relationship with and do not fully realize it. We have to cultivate and foster that relationship in order for it to grow, not unlike a relationship with a living, breathing being. Most of us do not get how creativity is something where we are able to impact the course … to be a proactive creator versus a reactive victim. 

We also have very different ideas of what creativity is. So what would work for you around creativity may not work for others. It is your special and unique relationship.

As with any relationship, there is a level of attention that needs to be turned towards self, especially around how we are influencing the relationship and the other participant in it. There is also a level of attention that needs to be given to the relationship itself. The question from this vantage point becomes “What is needed in order for the relationship to grow, thrive, flow, sustain, evolve, etc?”

Just recently we put on a COR Circle in San Francisco and the theme of the circle mirrored our theme for the month. At the circle, the group explored for themselves their relationship with Creativity. In true COR fashion, we inquired via the heart, head, body and even tapping into our higher self … that part of us that always knows. 

One framework we offered to view creativity through was Franz Rupert’s three selves – Healthy Self, Defended Self and Wounded Self. 

When we are at our most creative, our Healthy Self is fully online. Another way to phrase that is when we are most ourselves, authentic and fully self-expressed, we are open, connected, full of possibility and passion, and free to share ourselves and our creations with the world.  

When we are feeling pained around creativity, it is usually our Wounded Self that is present. This is the part of our self that experienced a wound around creativity at some point in our youth. We did not know how to discern what was happening around us or understand how to be with the pain when we were young. 

This leads to the creation of the Defended Self. The job of this part is to protect the Wounded Self, at any cost. The Defended Self is committed to preventing the Wounded Self from ever feeling pain again. It has very sophisticated tactics that seem practical and subtly manipulative. Those writer's blocks, critic voices, procrastination, or sudden urges to clean the house versus create … those all could be different faces of the Defended Self. 

At the Circle we got to not only explore what creativity was for us (mentally), we inquired into what it felt like for us in our bodies. We then ventured into the question around what gets in the way of creativity and finally, what people need when it comes to creative blocks. We discovered, we shared, and we danced. What better way to connect creativity even more strongly to your body and anchor in all of the revelations and inspirations we collectively experienced?

If you'd like to go on your own body movement journey that we embarked on at the COR Circle, you can listen to our Spotify Playlist.

My invitation for you as we wrap up this month is to truly discover what creativity is for you and what type of relationship you want to cultivate with it. The world would be a much happier and healthier place if we were all feeling fully expressed and sharing our creations with the world. 

Natalie Vartanian is a certified life coach, workshop facilitator, writer and speaker. Her mission is to help people lead their most turned on lives – to experience freedom, acceptance, and full self expression. For the past eight years, she has worked with clients around the world to help them get the intimacy, love, and careers they truly desire in a fun and effortless way. Her work has been featured in elephant journal and Good Men Project. She is also the creator of the Virtual Love Course, co-host of Sex the Podcast, and host of Taboo and Turn On. Natalie is working on self-publishing her first book in February 2020.